Matriculation

I read in a commentary that graduation for the Christian comes when he or she no longer fears death.

One night I had a strange dream. I was walking up the isle of an outdoor stadium. There was no one around but a women with a hood who was running towards me. When she got to me, she stabbed me with a knife. Instead of waking up, I thought, “I knew something special was going to happen today!” I remembered the dream the next morning. I realized that I had slept though my own death and that I felt no fear. I had matriculated.

…that through death he might destroy him that had the power of death, that is, the devil; And deliver them who through fear of death were all their lifetime subject to bondage. -Hbr 2:15

Be Anxious for Nothing

In 1980 I started a small public accounting business. At this time I had a toddler and a baby on the way, so I wanted a job where I could work from home. In 1980 I took out a small business loan and bought an Apple II+ and accounting software. I had learned accounting by writing accounting programs at work. I would use the computer and the software to help small businesses with their bookkeeping.

After I was divorced the Lord was faithful to use this business to keep me afloat financially for 20 years, until my children were grown. I don’t know for sure, but I think is rare to find a single mom that doesn’t have to work outside of the home. I have never met another.

I only worked about 80 hours a month and I didn’t earn much, but the Lord always saw to it that I had enough. Truly my shoes didn’t wear out in the desert. Also my car never broke down, and I was never late with my bills. I never had extra, but I don’t believe the Lord wants me to have extra. Even today, if I find I have extra money, I know a bill is coming. Just last month, three times people offered me money. Sure enough I had a big repair bill. The Lord took care of it.

One thing that was difficult as a single mother with two young children is that there was no one to remember my birthday; no one, that is, except the Lord. In those years I never celebrated a birthday without a gift. They came from unexpected places. One I remember clearly is receiving a new pair of shoes as a gift from someone in the church who had no idea it was my birthday. I needed a nice pair for work and the Lord remembered. Some years the gifts were simpler. The kids made me gifts without even realizing it was my birthday. Then there was the special issue of Newsweek, but I will talk about that later.

What I learned was not to trust money. I was the only accountant I knew that didn’t believe in money. In my experience, money comes from the Lord and goes as the Lord intends it. I am just a steward. I don’t have to worry about the future or about a rainy day. The Lord will take care of rainy days and my future.

Now that I am older, I have plenty on my balance sheet; but I know this can change tomorrow. If I lose it all, I pray that it wouldn’t ruin my day. Through decades I have learned that the Lord is my provision. My true treasures are beyond the reach of this world’s economic system.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. -Phl 4:6